Ah Monzi Cat. So close to your 18th birthday and just a week after Livvie. Our three oldest cats lost in the same year. But this is the one that really hurts. The thing I’ve been dreading at every sign of old age you showed. The thing that made me hold you even tighter at night. The thing that made me remind you every day that you had to make it to 20, that was the deal. The thing that finally and suddenly happened and now you’re gone there’s just nothing. This vast nothing in my life where you used to be. We spent over 14 years together, more than half of my lifetime. All that time and all that love, it’s too much to think about. There aren’t words for this kind of devastation. Three days of crying and still the tears keep coming. I feel like they’ll never truly stop. And you held on so tightly, even though I tried to tell you it was okay, forget the deal, you can sleep now. Still you refused, you were always so brave and so strong. My sweet girl, I’ll love you and miss you forever.